madameblueeyes

Start of a brand new blog!

2008-03-01T19:37:00.003-05:00

Have been in town for almost three months. Job status: unemployed, with sporadic babysitting gigs that allow me to buy enough gas to run my car for a week or two. Maybe one of those subpar heat and eat Indian entrees that are supposedly "Suitable for vegetarians" too. Note: if thou art a history major deadset against teaching and uncertain about grad school, then be prepared to work retail or watch a lot of daytime tv. Or eat good food that often. I can't even find a job as a secretary because I don't have 1 year experience in an office setting. Ok, it's basically answering phones and typing stuff. Is 1 year experience really that important? Kindergarten kids can answer phones and use computers. Not hard, mmkay?

Pfft. The Sequel.

2007-10-18T20:20:00.000-04:00

Graduation is exactly two months away. I'm trying not to think about it, really. Partially because I have so much other stuff to do, but also because I feel like I started freshman year yesterday and I'm not quite sure I'm ready to leave. Yeah, I've had my complains about this place, but the whole college experience is something I'll never have again. Supposedly graduate school is the new college, but how much truth is there in that statement? Graduate school is where you go to get a degree that will earn you an actual living (but only if you're a humanities or psych major-- everyone else pretty much has it made), so means no more slacking off. Showing up to class in pajamas will be out, as will late night trips to WaHo (that's Waffle House to you-- that unfortunate clotter of Southern arteries) followed by the late nights spent awake wishing you had just stayed home. What else will I be missing out on? Major study sessions which have all ended in one of three ways.
1) A trip to Waffle House
2) Duck chasing. Nuff said.
3) A nervous breakdown by one or more people.
The higher the number of people having breakdowns is directly related to how
challenging the study guide is. The biggest ever group hissy fit: US
Diplomatic History

2007-09-19T08:37:00.000-04:00

Having no classes on Tuesday is a little bit of a drag. Yeah, I'll be really glad about that a little later on in the semester when I have to seriously start working on my senior thesis, but now it's a little boring.

Last night I went to a Green Student United meeting, and managed to be appointed chair of the waste reduction committee. As chair, I get to help get the school adopt some sort of recycling program, and figure out how much trash the school as a whole gets rid of. That will probably involve, though I try not to think about it, getting up close and personal with the trash. Nah, I can handle it.

2007-08-23T21:23:00.000-04:00

Having survived my first few days back at school, I can honestly say that I feel pretty good about being back up here. Despite everything. Everything being that I have to write a senior thesis, take the GRE, get my grad school applications in, get the fat naked guy to stop lurking by my window, and find a way to get Sallie Mae to quit screwing with me. "Dear Ms. B---, Congratulations on graduating early. Screw you. Now pay us a bunch of stupid fees that normal students don't have to pay."

Last Days of Summer

2007-08-02T14:36:00.001-04:00

So yeah, school is right around the corner. I have mixed feelings about this. I'm thrilled that pretty soon I won't have to worry about the whole secret double life thing, but I am less than thrilled to be going back to isolated College Town. Also the girls in the dorm last year wouldn't ever shut the fuck up. Maybe it'll be different this year. Either that or I'll have to introduce them to the wonder that is Tylenol PM.

Despite having the last week and a half off work (gotta love being a contingent), all I've managed to do is pack up two boxes for back to school, totally messing up my room in the process. Oh yeah, thanks to my mother's Swiss-made food chopper, one of my fingers is a little bit shorter than it used to be. My accomplishments are few, but massive. Because hey, lets face it, only the massively clumsy can manage to slice off 1/8 of a pinky finger. And only the massively lazy can boast about having packed up two boxes. After I found my IPod ("missing" since early May), I lost interest in the packing.

Three months

2007-07-21T22:17:00.000-04:00

Poor neglected little blog. Poor overworked little blogger. Place of Employment is crushing my soul. Asheville weekends rock though. Where else can one run around a hotel built on a mountain (and come really close to crashing a wedding-- whoops), fall off a chair at the JCC pool, read really funny parts of Cosmopolitan out loud at Barnes and Noble, and bake vegan cookies for an extremely lactose intolerant Israeli camp counselor?

Ok, maybe you can do those things anywhere.

On no longer being SLAMmed

2007-04-19T18:11:00.000-04:00

Yesterday was my school's first ever undergrad research symposium, oddly named SLAM. I'm not the world's best public speaker, and yet I did a presentation. I can practice for hours, and I did, but then I step out on stage and my mind goes completely blank. Somehow I managed to survive the presentation without a) running out of the theatre, b) having another mini-breakdown in which I questioned my sanity, or c) making people fall asleep in their chairs. My good feelings about my presentation kinda evaporated after the college sweetheart gave her presentation, but hey, that's life. I'm kinda glad that we were presenting in the same session. There would have been a lot less people there without her.

Our keynote speaker was, pretty much, the world's foremost scholar on hip hop. Visit her website, she's awesome! Hip hop and rap aren't my favorite genres, but after hearing Dr. Rose's lecture, I was struck by the urge to start listening to more rap and hip hop. Funny how easily something/someone can come along and change your entire opinion.

It's also funny how an entire college campus can piss and moan about having to go to all the presentations, but then have no problem showing up for an iPod drawing. Ahh, people.

2007-04-18T21:40:00.001-04:00

Looking back over the last 48 hours, it's really amazing how college students from around the country have joined together in solidarity for the students of Virginia Tech. Right after I heard about the shootings, I joined a Facebook tribute group of 17,000. A day later, the group had grown by 100,000 people and is now 250,000+ strong, and has branched off into a number of websites. And while it would be awesome for people to simply remember the victims without getting into political pissing matches, it's never that easy. Right now, as more and more details are coming out about the perpetrator's nature, one has to wonder why no one saw that there might have been a problem in the making and done something about it? Okay, maybe the guy did obtain those guns legally according to VA laws, but come on? If gun control laws can't be made stricter, then maybe make people with clean records looking to buy a gun undergo a psychiatric exam. It's a start, you know?

Everything that happened is so pointless and sad, and people are right, it really could happen anywhere. Will this finally be the straw that breaks the camel's back and forces our government to look at our gun control laws and realize that this kind of thing cannot keep happening!

2007-04-17T12:36:00.000-04:00

Stupid internet

2007-03-28T10:29:00.001-04:00

The internet goes down a lot around here. I should be used to it by now, and in fact I am used to the internet going down for a couple of hours, five hours max. Four days without internet access is something completely different. Four days without internet sent me through the five stages of grief. As sad as that sounds, I live in the middle of nowhere and depend on the internet as a link to the rest of the world. Because watching TV gets old fast.

I agree with yellow emo dude

2007-03-06T15:25:00.000-05:00

Yessssssss!

2007-02-22T18:21:00.000-05:00

It got up into the 60s today! Hahahaha!

For the first time in months, the Camilla got to wear these....

And tomorrow, it's supposed to be cold again.

But that's ok, I'm going east!

I'm sick of naming my posts

2007-02-21T18:30:00.000-05:00

It's been raining all day. I'm normally not a big fan of rain, because it always manages to catch me without an umbrella. This rain was okay though. It was just rain. Not mixed with snow, ice or anything winterish. Just rain. The rain actually started last night, along with some hellacious thunder. The thunder woke me up around two, and after realizing that the back wall of my room was still there and I wasn't going to fall into the abyss, I managed to go back to sleep. Of course I didn't realize that in the process of being scared shitless by the thunder, I somehow managed to send my alarm clock flying across the room. I still don't know exactly where it is. Without the alarm clock though, I kinda missed my eight o'clock wakeup to go down to the gym. I managed to drag my unhappy butt down there at nine thirty. Mmm, it's awesome not having class until eleven. Its also awesome being able to go outside without a ginormous winter coat, hat, gloves, scarf, etc. That's probably why I was able to get out of bed so easily this morning without cursing myself for deciding to enroll at a school in the mountains. You know, cold weather just sucks the life right out of you. Maybe I should pick a grad school in a warmer place. Too bad I wouldn't get anything done at the U of Hawaii. Even if they did have a public history program.

2007-02-19T18:30:00.000-05:00

Since I didn't have anything better to do last weekend, I decided to go home. Relax, eat some good food, get my dad to buy me stuff, the usual. Traffic was absolutely horrendous. So horrendous that I'm not sure I want to go home again if it means having to put up with it taking a half hour to go 3/10 of a mile. I'm not a very patient person, and rush hour traffic tends to bring out the worst in me. No, I'm not a dangerous driver, I just like to scream "GO!!!!!" a lot. Usually at the car in front of me. Like they can go anywhere.

I'm beginning to view my parents as a source of entertainment instead of annoyance. They're getting older, bless 'em, and I guess I've never really noticed it before. They like to argue about the nitpickiest little things, and I think its hilarious. Like when the neighbor across the street fixed his roof. "Forget about the neighbors' roof Jim! When are you gonna fix our roof? I'm sick of my ceiling leaking everytime it rains!" Note: it's "hers" when it, whatever it is, breaks, stops working or leaks. It only becomes "theirs" when she can't fix it.

When I finally got back to school, I found out that I missed two things. One of them was snow, which I didn't mind missing. In fact it's the reason I went home. The second thing was finding out about AK's engagement (Mazal tov, AK and Dan!). I found out about it from Facebook. Not the best way to hear about your friend's engagement. And its the second time that its happened. What is it about senior year that makes people get engaged left, right and center?

2007-02-12T18:33:00.000-05:00

Hooray for warmer weather! Even if it isn't going to last. At least I got to go to Asheville without my heavy coat. Downtown Asheville is one of my favorite places because there's always something going on. I was there for three hours yesterday, and I got a bunch of great pictures for my photography class, as well as some chocolate covered espresso beans from Mast. I heart Mast! Not only do they have chocolate espresso beans for a reasonable price, they also have all kinds of cute Life is Good stuff and candy that I remember from my childhood. Gummy Coke bottles anyone?

As if I don't have enough going on in my life already, I'm working on my research proposal for Spring Slam. I've got my topic, it's the same one I presented over the summer to community college faculty from all over the country. Dr. K is of the opinion that it will look good on my CV for grad school, and I'm pretty much up for anything that helps with grad school. These last few months I've really started coming out of my shell. Being the shy, quiet one is getting so old. Speaking up in class is something I used to never do, but just last week Dr. G asked a question and the next thing I know I'm explaining to the class what the pogroms were. Dr. G's jaw dropped, and AK acted like a proud momma. "Look at you steppin' up! And I know where you learned the answer!" I actually learned the answer from Golda Meir's autobiography, not my intro class. Sorry AK.

And some days you just want to be alone

2007-02-07T20:58:00.000-05:00

Over the last two days, I managed to haul all my stuff out of my old room, and into my brand new single room. My new room is about 2/3 the size of my old one, but I am ok with that.

Old room: ugly desk looking thing attached along the entire back wall
New room: ugly desk taking up only half the wall

Old room: overlooking a walkway, where passersby would always stop to look in the room
New room: no more walkway

Old room: 3 channels came in (Comedy Central, Cartoon Network and TBS)
New room: 35 channels (and no more South Park, Adult Swim and Sex in the City as my only viewing options. I enjoy all of those shows, but enough is enough)

Old room: en suite bathroom (shared with a nymphomanic klepto who enjoyed stealing my triple blade razors as much as she enjoyed having sex in the shower that I too had to use).
New room: private bathroom (with a bathtub!) And now I will know for sure that that off white liquidy looking stuff is actually my conditioner, and not... well, you know.

Now all I have to do is unpack all the boxes laying around. Sigh.

I have tricky veins

2007-02-06T17:21:00.000-05:00

Today I gave blood for the first time. Not a pleasant experience, but one I plan on doing again someday. I walked into the little clinic they set up in the student union right on time, and one hour, two nurses, three tries (one in the right arm, two in the left), my blood was draining out into the little baggie. And now here I am munching on a brownie with pink and red sprinkles on top, and one of those cute mini cans of ginger ale.

"There's food involved?"
"Yes."
"And all I have to do is let you stick a metal spike* in my arm?"
"Yes."
"Ok!"

Behold my sexy, sexy arm.

*Note: "stick a metal spike in my arm" can be replaced with "sign me up for a credit card with a ridiculously high interest rate" and that little set of quotes up there loses none of its meaning.

You got a problem with that, honey?

2007-01-31T20:43:00.000-05:00

Ok, so I'm sitting here, waiting on it to start snowing. The weather people have been saying its going to snow today all week, and yet there isn't one snowflake in sight. Hell, there isn't even a cloud in sight.

Earlier this week, I was having lunch with Nicole, who is just about the sweetest girl on the planet. She's one of the few people that I've really opened up to about my desire to convert, but that's a different story for a different day. Nicole, like me, had the good fortune to be born in North Carolina. However, her life began several hundred miles west of mine. To hear me talk, it isn't immediately apparent that I'm an NC native. With Nicole, it's unmistakable. I often find myself wishing that I hadn't been brought up in a big, diverse city, and that I don't feel the need to hide my accent when I'm back home, especially at work. But that too is a different story for a different day.

The other day at lunch, Nicole and I were approached by this guy that wanted to know if the table next to us was taken. Nicole politely replied that "Yes, that table is taken, sorry." The guy, apparently unable to understand Appalachian English, made Nicole repeat herself several times before stalking off. Damn Yankee.

Now, I'm not going to turn this into an anti-Yankee rant. First of all, there's no point, and second of all, I don't want to alienate one-third of my readership. But the whole Southern stereotype thing is getting pretty fucking old. To hear some of my classmates/coworkers (who thought I was from Washington State for whatever reason)/customers talk, we Southerners are nothing but a bunch of ignorant, Jesus lovin', beer drinkin', snuff dippin' rednecks, and that there is nothing to do in the South but go to county fairs. Let me point out that I will (hopefully) have two masters degrees five years from now, I am on my way to becoming a JBC, I hate (most) beer and the only tobacco product I've ever tried was a cigarette, and that was just stupid. And for the there's nothing to do part, those people obviously haven't visited downtown Asheville, any part of Atlanta, or Charleston.

My sister-in-law's mom, a Carolina girl if ever I met one, moved up to BFE, Michigan a few years ago with her husband. Upon arrival, she was asked "Don't you just love it up here? This place is really thriving!" My sister-in-law's mom then replied "I'm from Charlotte. It's one of the biggest banking centers in the country. That's thriving. You people don't even have a movie theater."

Maybe, being from Charlotte, I'm not really qualified to talk about stuff like this. Still, it's something I felt like addressing.

Mall Restrooms... boy don't I feel safe now...

2007-01-23T17:03:00.000-05:00

*I don't normally post forwarded emails on my blog or even bother forwarding them on to people in my address book, but this seemed creepy enough. Hat tip: Sonja*

Please Send to Every Female You Know With Love for Their Safety!!!!!

The Latest Scam: Robbing Females Using the Bathrooms at Shopping Malls.

The way the scam works is, a man slips into the women's rest-room and sneaks into a stall. He waits until there is only one woman in the restroom in a neighboring stall. The criminal then stands on the toilet and points a hand gun into the next stall, demanding the woman's valuables. After getting her cash and jewelry, he demands that she remove all of her clothing and kick them out of the stall. The thief tosses the clothing into a shopping bag, hangs an out of order sign on the restroom door, and slips back into the mall. The out of order sign ensures no one will soon come to the woman's rescue. It usually takes an hour or two for the woman to work up the nerve to leave the restroom in the nude, giving the criminal ample time to make his get away. The woman is left naked and humiliated in a mall full of strangers. The best defense, says police, is to never go into a shopping mall restroom alone, as only women who are by themselves are targeted.

PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!!! This has so far been a nearly perfect crime, as none of the perpetrators have been caught. Don't let this happen to you!

Take that you woman hater*!

2007-01-23T16:50:00.000-05:00

I'm one day into my internship at the Thomas Wolfe house and I'm already sick of it. Why does it have to be so boring? If only it wouldn't help my chances of getting into State.

Oh yeah, wearing a mid-calf length skirt in the snow wasn't the best idea either.

*The woman hater in question is Wolfe. Even if he did have an affair with a married one.

Random ramblings

2007-01-17T15:22:00.000-05:00

I can't stand the classrooms in the education building. They almost seem like classrooms that a real college would have.

My NC Gov't/History teacher is the best NC Gov't/History class teacher to ever come out of Pennsylvania.

AK finally had her first real drink, ever. My baby's all grown up!

My new suitemate has a penchant for rearranging the furniture in her room at least one a day. While blaring Fall Out Boy.

I could convert by this December. Emotionally, however, I don't think I'll be ready. That doesn't mean I haven't emotionally matured a ton over the last few months.

Tuesday Night Blues

2007-01-09T20:19:00.000-05:00

Less than one week before I get out of this overpriced, overdeveloped hellhole of a city and back to my real life. Studying geography, Japanese history and leading tour groups through the Thomas Wolfe house will be infinitely more exciting than selling Coach and Dooney & Bourke handbags to spoiled teenagers. If only Look Homeward Angel wasn't so hellishly boring. Was Wolfe really that brilliant? Who knows? He did, however, have the good fortune to be born in Asheville.

Fa la la la la .... la la la .. la ??

2006-12-17T12:37:00.000-05:00

After four straight days of work, averaging between eight and nine hours a day on my feet, walking around being nice to people, I finally have a day off. And I have no idea what to do with it. The day after I got back from school, I started working. Moving straight from exam week to hectic work week means that even though I have the next two days off, I can't relax. I'll probably be walking out the door Tuesday morning when I finally reach that relaxed state. Then I'm going to drive out of my neighborhood and it'll be bumper to bumper all the way to Macy's.

Now would be the time that I would complain about all the crazies I had to deal with during the week, but I'm not going to do that. It's the holidays, and when you have to spend 30 minutes looking for a parking place, another 20 minutes walking to the store, and then fight your way through the crowds, hope that the store has what you need and then spend 15-30 minutes in line, then you simply cannot be held responsible for your words and actions.

Instead of complaints, I'll share some quotes. I am always coming up with new and exciting ways to embarrass myself.

to frustrated foreign shopper: "So, where are you visiting from?"
"Iceland"
"Wow, I've never met anyone from Iceland before."

to a woman of indeterminate age: "Are these for your granddaughter?"
"No... for my daughter."

at 11:30 pm, to the customer service clerk, after opening a credit account and winning a prize: "I have a bag, and it's a Kors bag. Go me!" (accompanied by a little retarded dance-- it was late, I was running solely on caffeine)

"Wow, I've been selling red hats all day. Red must be in."
"It's Christmas."
"Oh, I keep forgetting."

Ok, and here's one from a customer: "Thank you sir! I mean, ma'am. You are definitely not a sir, ma'am."

Five down, two to go

2006-12-12T18:50:00.000-05:00

Another semester over. I'm back at home, and I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, I get to be near the fam, eat food that won't make me sick, lose the incredibly pronounced accent I've picked up over the last few months, and on the other hand I get to spend 8+ hours a day in a department store, putting up with Christmas carols and annoying people, and I'm really gonna miss all my intro class and Saturday morning people. I already miss my friends. At least I got to spend some quality time with them before I left. Feeding marshmallows to ducks (it's hilarious-- try it sometime), chasing those same ducks around the park, sitting on the side of a country road in a car with a flat tire, watching Sex in the City and then having a minor nervous breakdown during the commercials (I don't wanna go home! I'm not ready to tell my mom that I'm converting!)... these are the moments I live for. Well, maybe not the nervous breakdown. I so could have done without that.

You know you wanna

2006-12-10T14:45:00.000-05:00

Plenty of visitors, but not a single comment since switching over. :(

How to post comments in this new craptastic beta format:

Click: "Post a comment". Then where it says "Choose Identity", click "other" and manually type your stuff.

thanks to: Tamara Eden

So leave me some comments. I would love it if you did.

A Blast from the Past

2006-12-03T11:30:00.000-05:00

I was going through my old blog over at Xanga, deleting entries when I came across a gem of a story I wrote during my last month of high school, for theater class. I won a Snickers bar for my efforts. Grammar and spelling aren't what they should be, but hey, I wrote it in high school.

A long time ago in a place that does not exist except in the minds of young children and the co-dependent, there was a princess with a major problem. When the princess was born, a bunch of fairies showed up to bestow their fairy-like gifts upon the regal infant. All the fairies from the kingdom were invited, except for one, who was deemed unworthy. This fairy, Beatrice was really mad, and decided that she would not let a simple thing like not being invited to the biggest party of the year keep her from going. So Beatrice showed up, and all the nice fairies hid in the corner.

“Where’s the brat?” Beatrice asked.

“Overrrrrr therrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeee,” someone studdered, pointing to a little jewel-encrusted crib where the princess was patiently waiting on her next present.

Beatrice took one enormous step over to the crib and looked down at the kid. The kid looked back, and wondered why Beatrice was not wearing pink like all the other fairies, or even smiling like all the other fairies. Beatrice bent down to get a closer look since her vision was bad and she couldn’t afford laser vision correction. It’s such a drag being an outcast fairy! The princess picked up her little toy scepter and hit Beatrice on the nose with it.

“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” Beatrice screamed, backing away. “That is it! I was actually going to give you a nice present, but since you did that, I’ll just put a curse on you instead! No pair of scissors will ever be able to cut your hair, except for one, and I’m not telling you where it is!” Beatrice then ran off, leaving the princess, her parents and the fairies standing there, stunned.
Princess Hairball, as she became known, was about sixteen when her curse became a real problem. Her hairdresser tried his hardest to find ways to style Hairball’s hair, but the fact was that the sheer weight of her hair was too much for her to stand. She could not hold her head up at all anymore, and had taken to wearing a neck brace just so she could look at people.
On Hairball’s seventeenth birthday, her hair had reached a width that made it impossible to leave her room. She was very sad, and she spent all of her time in her room with her hairdresser, who tried everything other than cutting her hair. After her fifth bleach job, done in an attempt to make Hairball’s hair become so brittle that it would break, Hairball gave up.

One day, five years after Hairball began spending all her time in her room, she received a visitor. She was shocked, since many people had come, claiming to have Beatrice’s magic scissors, but had promptly left, being scared to death by this girl with a bad bleaching job.
Hairball didn’t even get up to greet her visitor, partially because she could not. “I’ll save you princess!” he said, grabbing a huge hunk of hair and snipping it off with the scissors, which resembled hedge trimmers more than scissors. It took several hours, but Hairball was finally able to sit up, and then hold her head up.

“Oh thank you!” Hairball said once she had her first ever haircut. True, it was choppy beyond reason, but Hairball’s hairdresser could fix that.

“Your welcome,” the guy said.

“Yo! Harvey! It’s time to go home!” someone screamed from outside the window. Hairball poked her head out, not remembering the last time she had been able to do that.

“Your name is Harvey?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“You’re not even a real prince, are you?”

“Uh, no.”

It didn’t matter, because Hairball and Harvey got married anyway, because no prince wanted to marry Hairball. Not only was Queen Hairball a totally unflattering name, Hairball now had a new hair woe. She could now get her hair cut as often as she wanted, but the five consecutive bleaching were irreversible, and Hairball was doomed to spend the rest of her life with freakishly white hair.

Absolutes??

2006-12-02T13:59:00.000-05:00

I have a ton of stuff that has to be done by Friday, but yet, here I am, blogging away. Why does blogging have to be so addictive anyway?

Am absolutely thrilled that I managed to finish up Christmas shopping for the fam. Christmas means very little to me anymore, but the fam still really digs it and so I'll try to act excited for their sake. I thought that the mall would be slam full of crazies, but whaddyaknow, AK and I were easily the craziest people there. AK had to go visit her puppies over at the pet store, and I went over to the Hallmark store to pick up some Hanukkah cards. The cashier looked at me kinda weird, but whatever.

Am absolutely aggravated that the Bob wouldn't let me go to services this morning. I really thought the Bob and I were past all this, but I guess not. Roadside assistance is crap. Anyway, maybe I'll make it to intro class tomorrow. I kinda miss my intro class people...

The Bob is back in town

2006-11-30T10:10:00.000-05:00

All that drama over my poor car for nothing. The Bob is back, and running just fine (for the moment). Still scary as hell to drive though. Maybe if I work my ass off over break I can scrounge up enough for a down payment for a newish-used car from Mayberry.

Primal Scream

2006-11-29T08:55:00.000-05:00

30 November: take home exam due
1 December: presentation on Santeria

4 December: Biology exam and paper on Santeria due
5 December: exam on Nigerian and Iranian politics
7 December: presentation, write-up and possible exam
8 December: final exams in Western Civ, contemp. Latin America and Biology

Someone shoot me now.

I Miss The Bob

2006-11-28T11:55:00.000-05:00

The Bob is my car. Was my car, I should say. When he first came into my life, five years ago, I was not yet past the point when I still found it necessary to name everything I owned. Stuffed animals, computers, rubber bouncy balls... Anyway, my car became the Bob. Totally unoriginal, I know, but the Bob has become an institution. Back home, and up here. Many memorable things happened/were said in the Bob. Road trips across the state (and beyond), dozens of Waffle House runs, a few beer runs (B-double E-double R-U-N-- BEER RUN!), and a couple heart-to-heart chats. Even if I get a new car and name it the Bob, it just won't be the same.

And what hurts the most was the manner of the Bob's betrayal. If he would have broken down on the side of a safe, two lane road, I would be more ok with this. However, the Bob chose to break down as I was driving up a very dangerous stretch of interstate, straight up a mountain. No exit ramps, no medians. All I could do was wait on the granny next to me (going the same speed I was, and at that point I think I was going 20 mph in a 55) to realize that my hazards were on for a REASON, pull over to the slow lane for trucks, hope that I wouldn't get hit in the process, and wait for the cement barrier to end so I could pull into the grass.

We sat on the side of the road for an hour, waiting on tow truck guy to show. I had to deal with my parents freaking out and telling me that they were on the way (thanks mom, but you can't help me now!), friends calling only to say that they were really sorry, but no, they couldn't come pick us up, and my traveling companions trying to cheer me up. All I could do was sit in the drivers' seat, watching all the cars pass by, and think "Wow, G-d must really hate me today."

Finally tow truck guy showed up. And of course the minute that the Bob was on the truck, a cop pulled over and asked if we needed anything. The ride over to the body shop was not fun. There wasn't enough room for all of us in the cab, so S had to sit on my lap. We eventually made it back to school, safe and sound.

Now, all I have to do is figure out how I'm going to get to intro class and services this week. Having a car isn't everything, but it makes things so much easier.

Nightmare on 34th Street

2006-11-25T10:07:00.001-05:00

Black Friday is not the best day to go back to work after being gone for three months. Especially when Place of Employment was bought out by the biggest department store chain in the country. New Place of Employment is not nearly as cool. I can't use their coupons because I'm an employee, and HR can't keep me on the payroll when I'm at school, so I'll have to reapply for my job every holiday season and summer. However, they gave me a magnetic name badge. No more screwing up my shirts with clips and pins. That counts for something, right?

Though my shift actually started at five-thirty, the store didn't open until six. But it could have been much, much worse. I still had to deal with my fair share of crazies. Angry women that thought it was my fault, and had no problems letting me know so, that Place of Employment does not accept combined coupons. Or that we do not have coupons at the register to scan for every single person that asks. Hello, it's company policy... do not yell at me at 7:15 in the morning! Later on I had a kid get severely PO'ed at me because I can't speak Spanish (other than "Hola, como estas?". And the sheer numbers of people that wanted to use gift receipts as coupons...

To explain the title of this post: we were giving away copies of Miracle on 34th Street to our big spenders. I could not, for the life of me, remember the name of that movie, so I kept calling it Miracle on Elm Street and Nightmare on 34th Street. At one point I said to a customer "Wouldn't it be hilarious if Santa disguised himself as Krueger?" Luckily, she thought it was as funny as I did.

Gobble?

2006-11-23T09:58:00.000-05:00

So I'm home again. Awaiting the arrival of the family. Am actually excited about it. Our version of "Dirty Uncle Sal" might not even show up. Hooray, I will be spared the embarassment of him asking me if "those things" (my boobs) are real after he's had a couple beers. I will also be spared the task of having to knock out his one remaining tooth if he asks. Sound extreme? Well, I'm sick of it, and no one else in the fam ever says or does anything about it, so I'm taking the matter into my own hands. However, I am going to have a good time. My mom cooked enough food to feed an army, and I plan on eating a lot of it. Bring on the turkey! Bring on the cranberry salad! Bring on the deviled eggs! Bring on the ham! Nah, screw the ham. But do bring on the pumpkin pie!

Why? Why, Why, WHY???????????

2006-11-20T09:22:00.000-05:00

Getting sick or injured on holidays is something that comes naturally to me. Last Christmas I had the flu. Thanksgiving two years ago I had an upper respiratory tract infection. Spring break when I was seventeen I don't even know what I had, but I know I ran a temperature of 106. My mom physically carried me to the tub, dumped me in and threw ice cubes and cold water on me. Thanks mom.. Last 4th of July my contact broke (while I was wearing it), and I had to miss out on overtime $$ at Macy's so I could go to the ER and have one of their *fine* young doctors scratch my cornea. And then there was that time when all the neighborhood kids got head lice. On fucking New Years Eve! Currently, I have some kind of stomach bug. Am delighted to report that it is not food poisoning, which hey, after eating in the cafeteria, is nothing short of a miracle.

However, my attitude towards my roommate: not so good. When we came to our unspoken agreement that we would share certain things, I was thinking food, laundry money, alcohol. Anything but infectious diseases. And now she's at her house, resting up where mama can take care of her, and I'm here in my dorm room, sad and lonely with a badly drawn biohazard symbol on my door. I want someone to pour Sprite down my throat and bring me crackers. I want not to feel like typhoid Mary. Up until 11 pm last night, I thought that I had food poisoning, so I went about my business. Saw a play, went to intro class, went to my sorority meeting, spread my germs around... I really hope that no one gets sick because of me.

Sheer and Utter Boredom

2006-11-18T18:22:00.000-05:00

I have, sitting in front of me, five movies. I intend to watch all of them tonight, or at the very latest before time to go to intro class tomorrow. Gawd, I cannot wait until Tuesday.

An Evening With Maya Angelou

2006-11-17T12:14:00.000-05:00

The fact that someone that famous would bother to even come to this part of the state, and then to my craptastic little college is nothing short of a miracle. Never in my life have I seen so many people on campus. The auditorium can hold more people than this town has citizens, and every single seat was full. My first thought when Ms. Angelou took the stage was "Oh, she's so small!" I was expecting her to be almost larger than life. And then she started speaking. She talked about her life, read some poetry, made us laugh, made some of us cry, all in the span of an hour and a half. I only wish that she could have gone on talking all night.

More information about the event here and here

Some things I've realized in the last week

2006-11-15T12:03:00.000-05:00

1) I grind my teeth when I sleep. However, my roommate snores so I guess we're even.
2) Diet Ginger Ale is crap.
3) Christmas = completely uninteresting.
4) Oddballs tend to like me. What that says about me, who knows?

5) Three years at college and I'm still a procrastinating dumbass.

6) My attempts to hide my accent are not working as well as I thought.

The Well Meaning Freshman Who Won't Shut Up

2006-11-13T09:25:00.000-05:00

This has not been a good morning for me. After giving my alarm clock a thorough pounding (I'll have to reset it, so thorough was the pounding), I managed to get up, throw on some clothes and venture out into the freezing cold. Along the way, I encountered WMFWWSU. My first meeting with her was about two weeks ago. I took the long way this morning after I saw her up ahead, because I just knew that she was gonna want to do that talking thing that I'm not a big fan of that early in the morning. She didn't take the hint, and was waiting for me when I got to the sidewalk. She proceeded to complain about how cold it was, while I grunted my replies. She finally went to the library and I got to enjoy the silence for a few minutes until I got to class.

Now, it's not that I'm mean (well, not entirely). I would have treated my very best friend the same way if she were chattering incessantly in my ear at 7:45 in the frickin' morning.

Shabbat Shalom

2006-11-11T15:16:00.000-05:00

Today was my first visit to a synagogue in over a year. The last time I went was when I took a class on Judaism when I was a sophomore. My reasons for taking the class were because it was to be taught by a Holocaust survivor, and because it satisfied an elective requirement. Who knew that that class would lead me to where I am right now?

Since my reasons for going to services were much different this time than they were before, I was a lot more nervous. I kept wondering if I was allowed to read stuff out loud when the rest of the congregation did, and if it was ok to touch the scroll with the prayer book. I wasn't even sure if it would be ok for me to eat afterwards, because I didn't bring any food to share.

I did stay for lunch, and am so glad I did. I met a lot of new people, though I mostly tried to stay close to people I know from intro class. After I left, I was a little less than stoked to return to school, which is, honest to God, redneck central, so I kept on driving. All the way to Tennessee. I stopped at an overlook, hiked up to the top (easier said than done in a peasant skirt and glorified ballet slippers) and sat up there for a long time. This area might be backwards, but it is so beautiful. I got to see the last of the colored leaves. During peak, the mountains are almost blinding. Brilliant reds, yellows and oranges, everywhere you look. Everyone should come here at least once in their life, just to see the leaves in the fall. It is totally worth it.

Why can't I have a weak stomach?

2006-11-09T20:30:00.000-05:00

Ok, that isn't a question that a lot of people ask. But after spending two hours this morning, elbow deep in fetal pig guts, I would kill to be the squeamish one, instead of the one who always has to do the nasty stuff because no one else will. When Biology started, the teacher gave us all the impression that there would be no dissections. And yet, there I was at eight in the morning opening up a baby pig while the stench of formaldahyde nearly knocked me out. Not to mention having to put up with my very freshman lab partner. "Pig wiener!!!!!"

*WARNING: Stop here if easily grossed out. Seriously.*

See, I can totally handle looking at dead animal insides, if I didn't make that clear enough. The thing that bothers me is that I love animals and I get overly attached to them. Piggie wasn't any different than the cat I had to first skin and then dissect back in high school. Yes, I had to dissect a cat. Yes, I am still bothered by that four years later. Here's a giant example of how attached I get to animals: I remember looking down at poor little piggie this morning and thinking to myself: "This is so wrong. I bet this little critter (yeah, I'm Southern, deal with it) had hopes and dreams that did NOT involve lying on a table with her stomach cut open and her legs up in the air!" Later on when I found out she was a girl, I had to fight the urge to grab some paper towels and cover her up.

This has been my most graphic post ever. If you managed to finish reading it, go get yourself a nice treat. You deserve it.

Look Ma! Two posts in one day!

2006-11-08T12:17:00.000-05:00

I love penguins.

My first ever E-Bay purchase involved a penguin charm bracelet.

If it was possible to keep a penguin as a pet, I would be first in line at PetSmart.

But it isn't.

So, I will now entertain my viewers (all two of you-- thanks statcounter), as well as myself, with some penguiny goodness.

I haven't been this excited about an animated film in a very long time.

Dancing penguins are big in France too!

Who'll Stop the Rain?

2006-11-08T09:14:00.000-05:00

I like naming my blog posts after songs. It's very Grey's Anatomy-esque. Honestly, it quit raining a few minutes ago. However, I was sitting in biology, bored out of my mind when I came up with the title, and I don't want it to go to waste. So yeah, about rain. It's been mind-numbingly cold and rainy for the last 2 days. And not the normal rain. We've had the kind of rain that fluctuates between steady rain and misty drizzle. The kind of rain that makes you wonder if a different sort of precipitation will follow. 'Cause if it has to be this cold, I want to see some snow, dang it! In addition to our craptastic weather, every remaining leaf on campus has decided to part ways with its tree. A thousand little leaf bodies on the sidewalk. Enough to make one feel like they're committing leaficide.

And now for a public service announcement: Becca, leave me some comments! Please?

This Just In...

2006-11-05T16:09:00.000-05:00

I have a newfound appreciation for:

Marching bands

and...

Leggy blondes.

Not to mention marching bands with leggy blondes.

On Culture, or the lack thereof

2006-11-04T12:19:00.000-05:00

Going to a small college in the middle of nowhere certainly has its benefits. Having to drive at least twenty miles in either direction to find anything slightly resembling culture is not one of them. So what are a bunch of bored out of their minds college students to do on a Friday night? Organize and hold a Womanless Beauty Pageant! An hour of guys in dresses prancing around to the utter delight (and sheer horror) of their classmates. How can you go wrong with that?

The Countdown Begins

2006-11-03T15:58:00.000-05:00

This week was early registration. The happy, oh so happy time in which all the students wake themselves at the unholiest of all hours in the hope that maybe, just maybe, they will get the good classes. Me dragging my unhappy ass out of bed at 8 AM on my only morning off certainly did pay off. I managed to get one of the last available spots in the digital photography class. Woo hoo, I will soon be able to take neat little artsy pictures of my very own. I will no longer have to rely on stealing pictures from my friends' Facebook and Myspace pages.

When I was signing up for classes, I had a nice conversation with my advisor about graduation. I have just two semesters left, after I finish up with this one. Next semester will be spent interning at the Thomas Wolfe house, and my last will be spent preparing my senior thesis. Good thing I already have a general idea of what it will be on. Immigration, or perhaps ethnic communities in the Queen City. Good Lord it better not change. I don't have time to be fickle any more. I have a Plan. A few months ago I used to think that my Plan involved sticking around for that extra semester, taking a bunch of electives, hanging out with my friends, and all that jazz, but now I don't see the point in it. Sure, I'd love to have some more time with my friends, who wouldn't? However, I chose to attend a private school that was affordable when I first enrolled, but is no longer affordable thanks to ridiculous tuition hikes. Now all I want to do is graduate, get into State's Public History program, and then find the best, highest paying job available to me so I can start paying off all this money that I owe.

Loneliness?

2006-10-28T14:48:00.001-04:00

As of today, I have 0 profile views. Lets see how long I can keep it up. Having a blog that no one reads or even visits isn't such a bad thing though. For one, I don't have to worry about people I know (as well as people I don't) commenting on every little thing I write, which happened when I was a member of Xanga back in my lovely high school days. That brings me to my next point. I can talk about whatever I want, especially communication issues with the Mom, without people I know (or again, people that I don't know) reading about it and thinking I'm a horrible person. And now for my final point: I am a terrible writer and if I tried to write about anything that actually matters (i.e politics and such), I would, without a doubt, sound like an idiot. Therefore, having an unread blog will allow me to write about things that like that that interest me, if I so choose, and sound like an idiot while doing so, again if I so choose, without anyone ever knowing about it. Ha.

On a different note, I decided, for whatever reason, to get breakfast at the Waffle House this morning. Actually, it wasn't for "whatever reason." They're the only restaurant open here on the weekends that serves breakfast. I could have gone to the cafeteria, but I'm already sick. The point is, their manager is so desperate for employees that she nearly hired me on the spot. And I am so desperate for money that I nearly took the job. But alas, I have, in my quest to Graduate Early, maxed out on credit hours.

I never thought I would say this...

2006-10-24T22:55:00.000-04:00

...but it is good to be back. After being at home for the first time in two months, I realized why exactly I waited that long to go home. Since I am no longer a teenager, I should probably have a better relationship with my parents. But I don't. Maybe getting through one conversation with my mother without getting a headache or getting snippy is something that will take a few more years.

I'm new here

2006-10-24T21:36:00.000-04:00

Yep, so the title pretty much says it all. A real post to follow...