Gobble?

So I'm home again. Awaiting the arrival of the family. Am actually excited about it. Our version of "Dirty Uncle Sal" might not even show up. Hooray, I will be spared the embarassment of him asking me if "those things" (my boobs) are real after he's had a couple beers. I will also be spared the task of having to knock out his one remaining tooth if he asks. Sound extreme? Well, I'm sick of it, and no one else in the fam ever says or does anything about it, so I'm taking the matter into my own hands. However, I am going to have a good time. My mom cooked enough food to feed an army, and I plan on eating a lot of it. Bring on the turkey! Bring on the cranberry salad! Bring on the deviled eggs! Bring on the ham! Nah, screw the ham. But do bring on the pumpkin pie!